Constantine (2005) – 3.5/5

This was surprisingly not terrible. It works best when it isn’t explaining too much of what’s going on and you, in turn, don’t bother trying to make any kind of sense of it, like **SPOILERS** why that fat guy couldn’t drink anything after he screwed up whatever he was doing with that dead twin’s body, or what mystical powers Keanu’s arm tattoos had over angels, or why they killed that nerdy guy with the glasses near the end, or what the purpose of including The Spear of Destiny at all was given its relative non-use throughout the film. A macguffin, perhaps? **END SPOILERS** Eh, who cares, it’s not important to the story. None of these things are.

All these factors, and more, lend the film a sort of dumb mystical quality; a hint of mythical depth, if you will, that most films of its ilk don’t often possess. I also thought the ending was confusing, yet ultimately original enough, to forgive any previous stupidity on the plot’s part. Though why did they have to kill off **SPOILERS** Shia Labeuoffsfs’ character at the end? **END SPOILERS** He was the best character in the film!

Aside from a few cliché moments here and there, not a bad movie. Entertaining, with a decent story that could have used a little more work, but then would have probably required more thinking on the viewers’ part, which would have been a big no no for a film appealing to Keanu Reeves fans. Nothing against the guy, I like him, it’s just, his work isn’t exactly the pinnacle of high art, nor should it have to be.

So a good try, and a fun film overall.

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  1. July 25th, 2012

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