Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (2011) – 2/5

Boring and uninspired. A waste of a good opportunity, both as a franchise and as a movie. Even though the plot may be easier to understand than the previous two films in the series, it doesn’t have any of the magic or visual flair that made those two at least marginally interesting. And the third film was good in general, at least in my opinion. But this was just mediocre at best, and I’m being generous.

To its credit, though, it does have a few, FEW, interesting moments. Ian McShane is great, of course, and his introduction is probably the most stylistic, eye-catching thing in the film. The “mirror” fight between Penelope Cruz and Johnny Depp was also visually pretty creative, though ultimately kind of boring. And the whole mermaid scene was really great; how they managed to stage an attack by dozens of beautiful topless women while keeping things PG-13 is beyond me. Lots of CGI censorship probably. The mermaid subplot in general was interesting, but, like everything else about the film, it’s quickly driven into the ground by predictability and huge lapses in logic. Whatever.

Overall, eh. Boring film, pointless. Not all that entertaining, not even as a mindless action film. Hopefully this will be the last of them. But, of course, it won’t be.

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